
The older sister does not have the right to claim victimhood, but this might be her way to try to paper over her own guilt – and perhaps win sympathy as a way back into the family fold. Sexual abuse of a child is the ultimate violation. Where is her compassion, forgiveness and understanding toward her sister, who suffered as a child – and who might continue to suffer?
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They are now all senior citizens, and they could both benefit greatly from each other’s companionship and love.Īsk Amy: The bride’s mom wants to know how to enforce proper gift-givingĭear Fractured: The older sister seems to have spent all of her compassion and forgiveness on the man who sexually abused her young and vulnerable sister during much of the girl’s childhood. Is there hope after all this time that trust can be re-established? How should they make amends? The older sister feels like she’s the victim, due to the palpable rejection she feels from everyone else in the family. Sixty years have passed, and the entire family is still clouded by this disloyalty. She still feels that forgiveness of the predator was the best course, and she can’t grasp the depth of her younger sister’s hurt. Now the older sister feels rejected by the family because of her continued support of the predator. The victim no longer trusted her sister, and their relationship was never the same. She opted to keep him in her life, like a brother. The abuse was revealed, and the older sister said that everyone needed to forgive the predator. The young sister was threatened not to tell anyone.įast-forward 20 years. The abuse continued for at least four years. He began sexually assaulting the younger sister, who was 8. The eldest foster child was a boy in his early teens. When they were young, their parents brought foster children into the home.

It is actually old-school “networking.”ĭear Amy: Two sisters in our extended family have a broken relationship.
